Its 12.40 and im supposed to be sleeping so that i will have enough energy for tomorrow.
hahah die i've been writing cards since 9 -.-
I just read Jeannes April 16 post and i started crying again. Grah im such a cry baby.
AHHHHHH why does misfortune always happen to Jiayi. she overcame her fear. she worked so hard. she endured so much just for april 18. But just 2 days before it had to happen. AHHHH i feel so guilty. for being so knee-healthy and getting a chance to go up onto the comps tramp, but yet not working as hard as i should, not realising how lucky i am. arghhhhh. Sometimes i wonder how jiayi can have so much greatness inside her body, how shes such a impossible superwoman, performing all her miracles and blessing us. Arghhhhh whys life so unfair to her =[
Yesterday's training was sad. I just kept crashing and crashing until wang gave up on me. I just felt so sad and useless. What if i couldnt jie during comps. i would be letting down jiayi, letting down jeanne, letting down all my other teammates, and letting down wang.
The mood was low that training. Olly was feeling super stressed out, I was super frustrated with my shibaiing, and when Jiayi fell, that was it, everybody just plahhhhhhhhhhhh cryyyy. Sigh. Comps stress can really kill.
Anyway thank you to everybody who cheered for me. And those who kept saying "Jiayou Jiaqi. Alliteration!" hahahah =] Haha thanks even to the SJI guys
"well..i sortta witnessed the sji people being nice and FEELING for once. like when jiaqi was mega shibai-ing, they actually looked worried for her and they actually CLAPPED for her even before we did.and the fact that they botherd to come over to talk to jiayi bout her poor poor knee.well people, WE KNOW WE CAN DO IT!! WE'VE TRAINED HARD AND WE HAVE THE MOVES ITS ALL ABOUT DOING IT. JIAYOU NANYANG AND SJI TRAMP!!"
Although i didnt see it, but if its true, thank you!! =]
ShiChangDi was so much better today. Everybody performed rather okay =] And nobody crashed and fell off =]]]
I hope hope hope i will jie tomorrow and not crash... ah........
After shichangdi we went back to nanyang, ate lunch and went back for training at 3.30. wang just talked to us, and we trained for about 30 minutes only. And it was super slack training. After 430 when we were supposed to stop jumping, we practiced our walking in, mass prayed, mass beng jiao, and then everybody fell asleep all over the place. hahahah it was quite a funny sight =]]] And then we did comps presents for SJI. Jeanne bickering with Livia is super funny hahaha!
While writing cards today, I realised some stuff.
Comps isnt about winning, comps is just a weird phase gymmers have to go through. It is the great times spent with our team thats gonna stay in our memories forever, the bonds forged and strengthened throughout this period of time. This comps was a fantastic one, although actual comps is still tomorrow, because during trainings we discovered alot more about each other and everybody is so much more bonded now. And as long as we do our best we can, we are champs in our own rights!
The most important thing i realised was that I LOVE EVERYBODY. I love zoe, i love livia, i love qiaohui, i love fongyi, i love minyi, i love mindy, i love tessa, i love hazel, i love caijing, i love amanda, i love sianglin, i love shihui, i love rina, i love sammie, i love JIAYI, i love JEANNE, i love OLLY!!!! Everybody is so loveable! Everybody is so unique in their own ways, so supportive in their own ways, so lovely in their own way! And i am so grateful these are the people God chose for me to meet in the millions in the world. How can there be more lovely gym mates than all of them.
I love everybody!
